It's Hard to Explain

Pretty sure that this will be the fourth time I have written this post... er, re-written.

it's almost like when you have a dream and then you attempt to actually vocalize it and you just can't get it to make sense, or you just can't seem to paint a proper picture of what you saw and you sorta wish you hadn't really tried to explain the whole thing. like that. that's a bit how i feel right now, but i keep getting asked the question and so i'm going to do my best to very simply answer it. {my problem is that i like to anticipate what responses or questions might arise and try to address those, but since this is my fourth or fifth attempt, i'm just going to go with simple and I'm sure by the end I'll be wondering why in the world this has taken so long. oh well}.

so...

...we have a nice house in a nice neighborhood and we have plenty of room and many wonderful things to fill those rooms with.

*now insert 4 years of radical books, mission trips, intense bible studies, discussions with friends, and so on... right... about... here*

...but another way of looking at it is that we have a lot of stuff. and it just keeps growing and we keep cramming and storing and organizing and we're pretty much done with that whole thing.

...and we pretty much wanna use our resources on less stuff and live to be more people focused. locally and globally.

so...

...we've decided to buy a smaller house {really it's still huge by comparison to the rest of the world who often fills one room with an entire family, but it's the step we're taking for now}.

...and we're hoping that by getting a smaller house we will force ourselves to de-own and reduce our stuff and stress and all that...

...and by doing so we can hopefully have more resources available for that "people focus" thing i mentioned above.

it's been an adventure to say the least. my theme song has been "let it go". i grab an item as i sift through a drawer or closet or pile and ask myself if I need/use it or love it? if the answer is no, but i still hesitate getting rid of it, i sing "let it gooo, let it gooo" and quickly place it in the give bag or the trash bag. some stuff has been easier than other stuff. and i'm ok with that although it is a little embarrassing. but we've really tried to take this whole process with a posture of learning and growing. we pause and talk through things with the kids (sometimes not so beautifully because i'm dealing with my own sentimental attachments) but at the end of the day, we know it's all worth it and we're doing our best to place our complete trust in the Giver of all good things, and know that as we lighten our own material burden, we'll make ourselves more available to give more, and do more, and learn more, and grow more, and love more, and so on.

it really has been quite exciting. and challenging.

so that's it in a nutshell... my little explanation of our current path of life. :)